Directed by Jon M. Chu

Starring Constance Wu, Henry Golding, Michelle Yeoh, Gemma Chan, Awkwafina

From the beginning of Crazy Rich Asians I thought I might have gotten a great film. After a strong opening with Michelle Yeoh and then a smart intro to our lead couple, as well as wonderful transitions the many characters in this story, I was tricked into believing the movie would maintain its captivating pace. But then it devolves into a series of dinner and party scenes that offer little more than a look into the different cultures of the cast, which do not make for compelling storytelling. It’s not a bad movie, but a very flawed one.

It opens with a quote by Napoleon (I kid you not) : “China is a sleeping giant. Let her sleep, for when she wakes she will move the world.” Is this still a romantic comedy?

We open on Eleanor Young (played by the legend herself Michelle Yeoh), who enters a hotel with her family after escaping the rain in 1995. They’re unwelcomed by the hotel staff despite having reservations to stay. The clerks and manager do not even attempt to hide their overt racism. But of course Eleanor gets the last laugh as she purchases the hotel chain and ends up ordering those same lobbymen around. This scene is probably a big reason this movie exists. Asians have long been left out of the conversation of Hollywood racism, despite that they have been discriminated against as much as any other ethnic group. I’ll never forget reading about Lee Byung-hun, the South Korean actor in the most recent Magnificent Seven remake (which was NOT a good movie), and how he talked about experiencing blatant racism from his co-stars on other sets. That got me thinking about last year, when the pitiful Birth of the Dragon movie came out. Which was something nobody saw, and even though it was about Bruce Lee, it ended up focusing on a the relationship dramas of a white guy named Steve. If the most famous Asian man in history cannot be done justice then there is no hope for anyone. A white guy named Steve. In a movie about Bruce Lee. Are you fucking kidding me.

Hollywood has been a racist and misogynistic town forever. Cancer like La La Land is only the tip of the iceberg. They sometimes hide it well in their stories, and their casting, and their promotion. And really, it’s just so stupid that we have to even point these things out. I don’t really remark on these things unless they appear obvious to me, and usually that means the merit of the movie suffers in some way because of it. I’m glad films like Wonder Woman, and Black Panther, and Crazy Rich Asians exist. Because even though all three are just okay movies that are not worth a second look at, they will be the bridge for the next generation. We will get better and more original pieces from smothered voices, and that’s what’s really important. I will never watch these three movies ever again, but I love that they got made, and will inspire better filmmaking on their sequels.

But okay, enough tangents. Back to Crazy Rich Asians. Fast forward to 2018, and to Rachel Chu, our lead, in New York teaching economics. The film finds a way to integrate poker in her opening scene, and it’s pretty silly. But alright. Her boyfriend Nick picks her up as her lecture ends. The two of them share dessert together. It’s here Nick asks Rachel to accompany him to Singapore, where he’s going to be the best man at his best friend’s wedding. He wants her to meet his entire family. They’ve been together for a year, makes sense.

It’s also here a random girl at that same restaurant spots and recognizes Nick, and knows he’s more famous than Rachel could ever realize. Through an inventive series of pics and social media shares, word immediately gets to Nick’s mother in Singapore that he’s bringing a girl to meet her. Because Nick is Nick Young, someone really really famous. And really really rich. I loved the way the movie shows the insane speed of shared news, how I wish it kept up this visual flare for the rest of the runtime. But we’ll get to that.

Rachel eventually agrees (she still does not know who Nick Young really is), but while boarding the plane on a super first class flight it begins to hit her. This is also where Nick, and the movie, run through his family tree, and we get tiny segments showcasing them. The best of which is Nick’s cousin Astrid (my favorite) who moves with unwavering confidence. Nick explains she is the kindest of all his relatives, as her first scene involving a little girl tells us. Instantly we love her. She has a godlike aura about her, and played by Gemma Chan, is able to emote so much with just quiet motions. The movie doesn’t give her many lines or scenes, and I think that was a big mistake. The story deserved more of her. The mid credits scene makes that crystal clear. She’s already married, and the truth about her relationship with her husband is pretty obvious the first time we see them, but maybe that was the point.

Ronny Chieng plays another relative Eddie, who has a funny first line about “optimal angles”. There is also Awkwafina, who plays Peik Lin, Rachel’s friend who also lives in Singapore. She’s…well, she’s Awkwafina. She’s eccentric and flamboyant, and stands out like Diane Keaton did in the Godfather films. She gets a couple of the movie’s funniest lines, mostly because of her delivery. Her dad is played by Ken Jeong, and his first dinner scene is hilarious. He gets less funny as the movie goes on sadly.

But where am I getting at with all this? What I’m trying to say is the cast is mostly brilliant. Almost all of the actors here are A list, and I wish they were in a better movie. I think they’re the main reason people are excited for this movie. I dunno, I never read the book. I didn’t even know there was a book. Wait, there are three? Holy shit I’m clueless.

Anyway, we get to the point much promoted in the trailers. Rachel meets Nick’s mom at a lavish dinner party. Actually they meet in the back in the kitchen. I thought this would be a hell of a clashing, but instead it’s just a calmer and soft spoken conversation. We can tell Eleanor doesn’t like her, but I don’t think the movie does a good enough job with his moment. Nor later on, when they should be clashing more often, instead the two of them just aren’t onscreen together enough to warrant this hatred.

But on with it. This dinner is pretty boring. Not much interesting stuff happens, and the movie loses it’s great comedic presence it started out so strongly with. We could forgive this, but then we transition to two parties the next day. Nick’s best friend Colin’s bachelor party (hosted by his worst friend Bernard), and Colin’s fiance’s bachelorette party, which Rachel has been invited to. And neither is as funny as it should have been. And you’d THINK that Bernard flying them out to international waters in helicopters parodying The Ride of the Valkyries from Apocalypse Now would lead to comedic gold. But instead it’s a brief and lazily staged ship kegger that the movie skips on as quickly as it has arrived.

The bachelorette party is no better. It’s clothes shopping and spa treatments. Here, another girl Amanda, venomously attacks Rachel with information about Nick she doesn’t know. Rachel cries, and runs back to her room, where a gutted fish awaits her. Its blood and guts spread over her sheets, and a not so nice message left for her on the windows. Romantic comedy huh?

This is a mean spirited scene that is not properly built to. It’s jarring precisely because it shouldn’t be there. And cutting back and forth between this and Nick and Colin’s heart to heart is strange to say the least. Maybe it will work for you, but it definitely did not for me.

Then there’s another dinner. And it gets to another confrontation between Rachel and Eleanor. You think it’s going one way, and then it ends meanly with Eleanor telling her, “You’ll never be enough”. Gotta love your future inlaws.

There just isn’t enough in this movie to warrant these moments. Where does Eleanor have it in her to be this intentionally malicious? Why does Rachel have to be such an oblivious nuisance?

And then there’s the wedding scene. How I hate the wedding scene. A newly confident Rachel waltzing in to not be intimidated by Eleanor. And winning over a famous author who is sitting alone because the movie last minute decides she needs to. And the overplayed Can’t Help Falling in Love playing in the background, in Mandarin I think? while Rachel and Nick say I love you to each other across the room as Colin is getting married. And then water fills up the room as everyone waves around flowers, plants? Is this some Malaysian tradition I’m just too stupid to be familiar with? But the movie could  have been more cinematic with this. Instead I just cringed and shrank in my seat BEGGING for it all to end. Just awful maudlin and weak movie tropes everywhere.

But ok. I do like how it gets into how Asians do not view Asian Americans in a good manner. Just as how Killmonger in Black Panther was never accepted because he was only half Wakandan. As Nick points out Rachel’s strengths, Eleanor is quick to say “Chinese AMERICAN” in the most negative of tones. The film shows a lot about the differences. And how even though Rachel may be Chinese, she is completely different from Nick’s family because she is American.

I also do like how the movie does not talk down to its audience. A key moment with a ring at the end is a brilliant twist, and that nobody had to say it outloud was something I was so grateful for. And also that there’s a game of Mahjong played in an important back and forth between Rachel and Eleanor at the end. And how wonderful it is that you slowly have to figure out how it plays into what Rachel is saying, and what the point of the whole movie is. Incredible.

In the end, I think people will mostly enjoy this movie. It has some major problems, but this fantastic cast is it’s greatest aspect. And since we are getting two more movies I am actually excited about seeing them all return. Now that they’ve broken new ground with it, they can focus more on a better script and filmmaking. Because Crazy Rich Asians suffers from a weak story and an even more weak script. I can only guess the book went into more detail, but the film introduces  great characters and does not stick with them long enough, and instead diverts to those boring and useless dinners and parties. Cut those out and spend more time with Astrid and Eddie. And give more back and forths with Rachel and Eleanor. And for god’s sake bring back the humor. And I’ll just go ahead and say I did not like Constance Wu. She doesn’t seem like a bad actress, but here she is maybe too awkward and annoying for her own good. Perhaps that’s what the role called for, and maybe that’s also why Eleanor hates her. I felt she could have been way better, although she does great in the Mahjong confrontation. I’m also glad at least that Astrid gets the best burn of the whole movie, she needs her own spin off.

For sure I am not the target demographic for this material. I saw it with an Asian American friend of mine, who had a very different experience than me viewing it. There were moments and scenes that spoke to him specifically, and mirrored many parts of his own life and culture. It was semi-powerful for him, and he was glad to have seen a movie like this. And that’s exactly what this movie should do. Maybe then we will stop getting cancer from Hollywood and actually start to get great films that show us things about the world we do not know or recognize. And then we will never have to talk about Steve or La La Land again.